idealist healer

no ill intent, only naive idiocy.  i thought i could be honest without being reprimanded.  i hate playing false.  today was hard.  my idealism doesn't work in the real world.  it's pretty disillusioning to see... and it makes sense being such a terrible day after i spent such time in the Word and realigning myself with my Creator yesterday.  the spiritual attack is real. and so even more I press into Him who delivers me from my enemies.  Sad that I would have any, when I believe in respect and honesty.  turns out you have to BS your way through to get anywhere.  It's a shame.  I don't want any part of it.  God teach me how to live with integrity when all the lines are blurred and the distinction only gray.  Help me please you, not my boss.  Help me do what is right.  I can't do it.  It's not in me.